Your Most Important Relationship

25 March, 2021

It is impossible to explain to someone what mango tastes like. Yet for somebody who actually tasted it, just hearing a word ‘mango’ creates a very sensory experience. For a long time, the notion of the most important relationship being the one with yourself was like that mango to me. I kept on hearing how amazingly sweet and juicy it is. I understood it intellectually.

Last weekend though in the intensity of kundalini yoga teacher’s training I ‘got it’. It became evident to me that our relationship with the Higher Self/ Universe/ God/ Spirit/ Grace/ Unified Field (pick a name that resonates with you) supersedes any other relationship in our life. There is a hole deep inside each one of us that I am sure you have experienced the feeling of at some point. That hole typically feels like a lack, longing or loneliness. It takes us out on the quest to find the perfect intimate relationship, to build friendships, to strive for recognition, for significance, to become rich and famous. What we don’t account for is that all of these things will fail us at some point, none of them can fill the hole for a long time. There is nothing wrong with beautiful relationship, significance or being rich and famous, these just aren’t the right ‘filling’.

The relationship that supersedes any other is the alignment with our deeper truth, it is the stillness and the quiet knowing that we are a part of something bigger, just like the wave is a part of the ocean. Maintaining this relationship then means finding and fostering the connection with our deeper truth. A Course in Miracles says that 5 minutes in the morning spent with god ensure that he is in charge of our thought forms throughout the day. In other words, if we spent five minutes in the morning to realign with our deeper truth, we’d live the rest of our day more authentically. It would impact the quality of our decisions, how we show up for the people in our life, how we react in challenging situations and whether we are moving in the direction of our fulfilment.

There are many ways to connect to our deeper truth, to nurture the most important relationship we have. Kundalini yoga, meditation and gratitude do the magic for me. I know that if I start my day with either one of these practices (or all of them as they are so intertwined), it will be somewhat different. It doesn’t mean that nothing unpleasant will happen and the day will be just a pure bliss, however, my alignment will completely change how I respond because my response will be coming from a place of wholeness rather than lack.

When we take care of the most important relationship in our life (that with ourselves), our cup is overflowing and we show up more giving, more compassionate and more understanding in every other relationship we have.