Have you ever felt frustrated after doing one of the “imagine your life in 5 years-time, what would you like it to be” exercises? I certainly have. I would get really inspired and excited to start with, however, frustration would inevitably take over. It happens because there is a great gap between where we are at the moment and where it is that we would like to be.
I’d try to juggle my everyday responsibilities, with slightly diminished importance in my own perspective, waiting for that perfect moment to arrive when I can finally focus on my future vision and start bringing it to life. Sometimes we are so deeply entrenched in our new “big idea” that we completely lose touch with who we are and what we do in this very moment. Something I had to learn the hard way.
We create our future this very minute, whether we are changing the diapers, cleaning the house, sweating at our 9-5 job or actually working on our “big idea”. It is the integrity, we are doing all of those things with, that will determine the quality and evolution of our lives.
I discovered what works for me in those moments of frustration, and I hope that by sharing it I can be of help to you.
- Step outside your situation/life and look at it objectively as if you were only an observer, not a participant.
- Instead of looking for solutions “out there”, see how your immediate environment/current circumstances could support you in achieving your goal. Answers are usually much closer to “home” than we think. When we focus on the things “out there” it is easy to get frustrated because “out there” is so far from “home” – massive gap to fill. Let’s say, your dream is to run your own business but at the moment you are “stuck” in your 9-5 job. Perhaps you could commit and give your full attention to that 9-5 in order to see the opportunities to learn something of value that will empower you, to excel/achieve the level of mastery and build confidence, to exercise your entrepreneurial skills, and to meet people who could spark new ideas. When I say “commitment and attention” I mean be present and play fully. Often-times, in our head we are so in the future that we miss what’s right in front of us. You do not need to deny the desire to have your own business, but it is vital to stay open to the opportunities to do so that may be much closer to that “home base”.
- Play the roles you have to play today fully. Who are you? Wife/husband, mother/father, daughter/son, brother/sister, friend, business owner, colleague, marketing manager, chef, doctor, etc. I think we can only feel at peace within ourselves and move forward when we are able to play well roles assigned to us already. When I say “play well” I mean by our own standards, not by somebody else’s. Otherwise, how can we have mental-emotional space and confidence to take up more if we are, to some extent, failing already.
- The inspiration of the “big idea” takes us up high, however, frustration that follows may push us to question our own worth, and I saw it happen to many. Our self-worth is our birth right. Somebody believed in us enough to give us this precious life. Any self-doubt arises only when we start comparing ourselves to other people (feeling either inferior or superior, sense of superiority will give only short-lived fragile sense of self-worth, so both, sense of superiority and of inferiority, will ultimately result in self-doubt and confusion). That in itself is pointless because we are here to do different things – to serve in our own unique way. You are where you are on your journey. However, the beauty of it is that nobody knows where you could be tomorrow.
This is your starting point – the beginning of your journey to that next “big thing”. Instead of resenting what is, embrace it and use it to get to your destination.